-Misconceptions About “ Making New Friends”-

Dated: August 7 2020

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So, I’m sure there are some introverts out there asking themselves “well what about me? Am I doomed to fail before I even start my own small business?” Not at all, although it will require you to come out of your comfort zone. But don’t worry, it won’t be nearly as painful as you might imagine. Think of socializing and small-talk as the part of the business you might not like. It is like paying taxes. Nobody wants to do it. Sure some might not mind plugging in numbers and filling out paper-work, but when it comes to paying money or the obligation of the task, almost nobody WANTS to do it.

Here is the key... you are not looking for a BFF. You aren’t looking for someone to hang out with you every weekend, or invite you to be part of their wedding party. (Thank goodness! I love you guys and all, but I am so done with the ugly bridesmaid dresses!)  Many people think a true friendship must have an immediate deep level of chemistry or as Anne calls it, a Kindred Spirit.. Now I’m not saying that these sorts of things don’t happen, but deep friendships are rare. Sure it would be great if it does turn into that, and you shouldn’t count out any relationship right off the bat. However, this closeness is the pinnacle of a successful relationship, and it usually takes years and years to cultivate. So, when I mention “make new friends” I am not talking about friends of that magnitude. 

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More often than not, most friendships start and might stay at surface level for a while. In fact, many people are going to be at their capacity for deep relationships, and will instinctually keep you at a distance. That doesn’t mean they don’t like you, or that they won’t use your services, or that they don’t consider you their friend. And it shouldn’t view the friendship as a waste of time or that you shouldn’t make yourself visible in their lives. There is nothing wrong with these sorts of connections, and they can be pretty fulfilling in their own right.

This is what most friendships might look like. 

-Someone who says “hi” in the grocery store.

-Someone who adds you to their contacts on social media.

-Someone who would offer you a hot-dog at their cookout even though you weren’t invited.

-Someone who gravitates towards you in a room of strangers.

-Someone who knows your name.

 

That’s all you are looking for. Obviously, more inclusive and proactive signs are usually a fantastic indicator that they would use your services, however, base-level contacts are all you need in order to get started.

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Alison Stopani

Alison Stopani Hi! I am native of Colorado Springs and for as long as I can remember, I have always loved real estate. I have a passion for people. I'm excited to help both Sellers and Buyers with th....

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